TUGGED

It's gonna be stop-the-presses time when I get my talons on the new Celtic Frost album. Hopefully it won't suck ass-sticks & I'll forget why I was so eager to hear it. Kinda like the new Venom. Celtic Frost hasn't released anything new in almost 14 years, if you count the new songs they did for the 'best of' album.


I'm checking my sources twice a day now. Eeeeh.



HIS NAME IS ALIVE
DETROLA
Wacky/arty (former) 4AD band from the midwest that I've just never gotten into. I think his excursions into gospel etc drove me away. & all the feedback & bullshit is just sabotage. "Introduction" is a dirge thing with octavey female vox on top. Cue applause. Is this live? "After I Leave U" starts with a distorted rhythm, then follows distorted, hacked pop song elements. Female voice = nice. I sort of like this but I don't know if I'd bother listening to it again. "I Thought I Saw" starts with blues rock guitar, followed by stabby piano chords & a loping lilt that recalls American top 40 music of the late 1970s. I don't know how else to say it. Nice, I guess. At least different. Well, except that everyone from Air to Beck has done this sound to death in the last 10 years. No matter. This is nice. Thumb up. Pop music nowadays is so perfect down to the last detail & it's good to hear so much humanity + good tunes.


YRKOON
UNHEALTHY OPERA
Well-produced death metal. Slightly arty with the chorus but the Euro overtones are nice. This is more yer brutal end & not so much yer pop end of the death spectrum. "From the Depths" starts with a long halftime riff but builds back up to blister-beat speed. "Avatar Ceremony" has some sweet-ass guitar harmonies in the riffs. And the guitar solos are melodic. Which is always nice.


MYSTIC CIRCLE
THE BLOODY PATH OF GOD
"Hellborn" starts with a slow, moody keyboard riffy bit. Then syncopation building into simply brutal, halftime Nordic death. That didn't make any sense, did it. The vocals are like Dimmu Borgir, maybe the whole thing is. "Church of Sacrifice" is more of the same. The drumming is cool. The keyboards might be a little fruity, but, whatever. Nice cover of Celtic Frost "Circle of the Tyrants". Which just makes me even more eager to hear the new Celtic Frost. I hope it doesn't suck. What were we talking about again?


AMATORY
DISCOVERY
"Don't Fuck With My Heart". HA! What the hell is this? It starts with a straight synth loop & drum/bass bit. Nice sample of a chick singing "la la la la, don't fuck with my heart". Then....whoosh, it's a death metal song. How did that happen? Double-kick drums, growling vocals. But the chorus kicks in & it's that groove again. My god. That rules. Song of the day. So far. Then "Ace of Spades" reconfigured as a brutal death metal track. Clearly, Amatory knows how to party. "Into the Fire" sounds like fun. Is this another cover? "Rock Baby" too.


ANTI-FLAG
FOR BLOOD AND EMPIRE
Uptempo punk rock. Unfortunate pop overtones. Please no.


YEAH YEAH YEAHS
SHOW YOUR BONES
Were these guys sort of popular at one point? Whatever. "Gold Lion" starts humbly with acoustic guitar & thwapped snare. Plus female singing. Nice falsetto "ooh oooh" thing. Sounds like the whole thing kind of leans that way. Maybe for those who miss No Doubt. "Turn Into" sounds like a cover of the Strokes, Killers, etc etc etc etc to infinity. ie every other band in the world right now.


WARRANT
BORN AGAIN
Oh my fucking god dude. I've always hated everything this band stood for. Their music, all the smiling in their fucking videos. Their lame lame sexism. I know that lots of musicians from this once-popular sonic genepool are still bitter about big bad grunge coming along & taking away their jobs. But seriously, fuck Warrant. So I guess I'm kind of reluctantly even letting this shit play while I type this. If I think about KISS while the first track plays, I can deal with it better. Jaime St James is the new singer. I think I liked Black & Blue at one point as a lad. Back to the action. Shockingly, this doesn't make me homicidal. It's just, like, harmless 1980s throwback hard rock. If Ratt made an album like this it would be a return to form. I'll try to cut these guys some slack. I just don't know if I can admit to that in public.


WILLIE NELSON
YOU DON'T KNOW ME: THE SONGS OF CINDY WALKER
What? I've never listened to Willie Nelson before. I assumed he was a big enough songwriter to not have to grovel like this at the feet of someone I've never heard of. Y'know what this sounds like? Fucking Willie Nelson. Now get out of my face.


VETO
THERE'S A BEAT IN ALL MACHINES
Uh. I like the poingy upper-register guitar or is it bass intro. But the singer dude could derail the whole thing before it even starts. Fortunately when the drums & bass kick in for real, they're arty & all over the place. It's not just stomping & clapping, for once. Not that there's anything wrong with that. If Gary Numan had made a prog album. "We Are Not Your Friends" sounds like a synthathetic ballad. Synthathetic, that's my new word. "You Are a Knife" is a cross between Radiohead & The Cars. "I Brought the BBQ" is another low-key synth-moper. I'll have to hear it again before I can say for sure but on the surface it seems pretty cool. So far.


BEYOND FEAR
BEYOND FEAR
Um. "Scream Machine" kicks off kinda Slayer-esquely. But then the singing comes in & sounds like fucking Geoff Tate. Oh my god. I think I knew subconsciously that this type of music was popular in other parts of the world. Because it just sounds like Lizzy Borden playing death metal to me.


DAVID GILMOUR
ON AN ISLAND
Well, "Castellorizon" certainly takes its time getting going. The whole thing is just a slow instrumental build-up. "On an Island" is slow & shuffly. Sounds like Pink Floyd on an XTC kick. That's XTC the band, not ecstasy the tablet. Or, Gilmour Does McCartney. & I guess I still don't know what differentiates a David Gilmour album from a Pink Floyd one. This is pleasant enough for what it is. And I've certainly heard worse solo albums by 1960s guys in the recent past.



THEATRE OF TRAGEDY
STORM
If Ace Of Base had been a black metal band. "Disintegration" = not a Cure cover.



THE SWORD
AGE OF WINTERS
So, the slow stoner doom (duo?) thing is here. Here it is in all its fat slow turgidity. Plus synths. So it must be cool. Detuned guitars & long long drum fills. I should love it.


THE ALPINE
ON FEEL TRIPS
"Box Office Band"...oh shit. The early 80s are back again. Is this Duran Duran or Styx? Or...REO Sheepwagon? Co-ed vocals? Or does that dude just a have a really really high chick-like voice? More questions than answers here, I'm afraid. "Don't Touch the China" = nice song title.



SWORN ENEMY
THE BEGINNING OF THE END
Screamy well produced death metal hardcore. Like a smoothed out Lamb of God. Wait, smoothed-out lamb, isn't that what they use for gyro meat?


SWEETBOX
ADDICTED
God damn. Chick singer super commercial pop music. Nothing here is an accident. That's something else. I can't even compare this to anything, such is the void of my of knowledge on the subject of top 40 music.


SMOKIE
FROM THE HEART
Um, might be country. Sounds like fucking country.


SCARFACE
MY HOMIES PART 2
Unfortunately I missed Part 1, so I'm catching up now. I remember being interested in the first big Geto Boys album because it was banned before it was even released. Whitey was running scared but shit was for real. And it was a few months before I even heard it. & then it really did scare the fuck out of me. I still like that first album, didn't bother with any of the rest. The only names I recognize on the long line of guests here are equally OG. Hah. Like Ice Cube. I can't quantify why but this annoys me far less than most current hiphop. Good to hear Bushwick Bill still layin' it down. And shit.


PUBLIC ENEMY
REBIRTH OF A NATION
As much as I'm pulling for Chuck D & Flavor Flav to get down like they did in 1988-89, this isn't it. Too many concessions to today's pop charts. The best thing they could do now is either hang shit up for good or hire a bunch of young dudes who were heavily influenced by 'It Takes a Nation of Millions'. Like me. Fuck, I could make a more hyped track than this Geritol commercial. "Rise" is Flavor's spot & makes one backward concession with the squeeey horn hit. But, come on. Chuck's flow is on, but shit. The music is weak & pointless. And is there a hook? Hell no. This doesn't make me want to join a revolution.


PRINCE
3121
Revolution, get it? Nice lead-in there. You probably didn't even catch it. Okay, the last Prince album I heard was the one with "Alphabet Street". So, what the hell can I say about this? His drummer is on the cover of the most recent Berklee alumni mag. I didn't realize Prince stayed so busy. "Lolita" is the future grafted to the past. & I think "Black Sweat" is the big hit single at the mo. You know more about Prince than I do. It grooves & it doesn't suck.


PLACEBO
MEDS
How is this band so fucking popular? That guy's voice sucks ass! Remember the band Bush? How they were massive in the US & tiny at home in the UK. Well, this is the first thing I've heard by Placebo. And I fucking hate that guy's voice. There's no way.


OUT OUT
VIRTUAL SOUND IMAGES
Heavily layered electronic techno beat dance music. But not obnoxious. I have to stress that. "Forestry for the Thieves" and "Ampex, My Ampex" are the titles of the day.


SUMMONING
OATH BOUND
What is this, Lord Of The Rings metal? The orchestral shit is way louder than everything else. The drums sound like they're on top of a tiny mountain. The vocals rule though, raw classic black metal low-screechy. Oh, and 'fucking epic'.


BAL-SAGOTH
THE CTHONIC CHRONICLES
I'm ignorant so this just reminds me of Dimmu Borgir. Black metal with keyboards. It might be really cool.


MUDHONEY
UNDER A BILLION SUNS
Yep, that's pretty much what I remember them sounding like. Two guitars, bass, drums & vocals. Not bad but still nothing I'm going to bother with again.

JOEY MOE
MOETOWN
I feel about 70 now.


GARY NUMAN
JAGGED
What? I'm the biggest Numanoid I know, how come I didn't know about this until just now? Damn. Okay. Well, it sounds like a continuation of his work of the past few years. I like him, that's why I call it 'work'. "Halo" gives away the Nine Inch Nails influence. The whole album sounds dark & menacing. Just like 'Pure'. I'll definitely have to check this one again.


GARY MOORE
OLD NEW BALLADS BLUE
Fuck the blues, especially when played by affluent British white guys.


FITTA WARRI
SABABA VIBES
Modern dancehall reggae stuff. Interesting. Who knew. It kicks Public Enemy's ass.